Say It Ain’t So!

Sherri and Jenny Fired!  Photo by TMZ


When I heard the news Friday evening, I was blown away.
I hate to admit, that I had stopped watching The View a while back and only recently started watching it again, because I wanted to make sure I was there for Barbara Walters’ retirement.
I found both Sherri and Jenny very entertaining. Especially Jenny because she was both funny and down-to-earth. A real survivor. And I was genuinely happy to hear of her engagement to Mark Walberg.
And I was equally shocked to hear of Sherri’s divorce, which, quite frankly, she should have discussed more, i.e. Star Jones’ weight loss surgery.
However, I don’t think either woman deserved being fired, especially the way in which it was done.
All I could think about were the times I’d been fired, unexpectedly, and what a traumatic feeling it was. It rocks you down to your core and you spend the next few days questioning everything you did, or worse, didn’t do. Like a dog chasing its tail.

Then comes the ‘pity’ phone calls from all your friends and relatives — the ones who only call during a disaster – YOURS. And if you survive that, you feel you owe it to yourself to drown your sorrows in either booze or ice cream wearing the obligatory sweatpants.
And then there’s the dreaded shame of dragging yourself down to the unemployment office to file for unemployment compensation. In their case, wearing dark glasses, of course.

SIDE NOTE: Sheri and Jenny make sure you don’t skip this step. The two of you should take Barbara and Bill for every, penny, nickel, dime, quarter, fifty cent, dollar you can get! (It took me a while to learn that this is very very important! Not just from a financial point, but because it will make future employers think twice about firing you.

Jenny, keep writing books and marry Wahlberg. And Sherri, I see lots of sitcoms in your future. Grab them while they’re being offered. Don’t turn down a job being offered out of pity just like men don’t turn down sex being offered out of pity.

P.S. Woody Allen may be a great writer, producer, and director, but he still crossed the line!

A Tiny Kitten With A Big Mouth


Eliza Ankum
Author of
Ruby Sanders
Flight 404
STALKED! By Voices




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